A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.” This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks. “Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.”
astghik Food Jokes
A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream." Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!"
rockabillyray Food Jokes
A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner. Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess. The dad said, "Well it's what Mommy calls me sometimes." The little girl screamed to her brother, "Don't eat it. Its an asshole!
blackray Food Jokes
Q: Why do Mexicans eat beans for dinner?
A: So they can take bubble baths.
TheLaughFa... Food Jokes
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%. It's called a wedding cake.
LaughFactory Food Jokes
Your Halloween costume came in the mail today. I opened it. It was a rooster mask and a bag of lollipops. Going as a c*ck sucker again!?
jewelzee86 Food Jokes
Q: Have you ever had Ethiopian food?
A: Neither have they.
Cmanjakaa Food Jokes
Q: What do you call a sad coffee?
A: Depresso.
Anonymous Food Jokes
Q: What kind of candy do Indians give out on Halloween?
A: Dots.
Tyler Harr... Food Jokes
Q: Why don't Mexicans like to barbecue?
A: Because the beans fall through the grill.
Redzephyr23 Food Jokes
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